You See

In memory of those sweet souls that
lost their war to addiction,
and hopefully an anthem to those
presently at war with it.


You see, I have this disease.
Smells like a funeral.
It makes me believe ,
I have control.

I'm just weak,
And falling apart

Lord, help me please!
Pull me apart.
I need surgery!

I ain't messin' around
Do it now!

You see, I have this disease.
It runs through my veins,
Can I not be free?

Cause I'm just weak,
And falling apart

Lord, help me please!
Tear me apart
I need surgery!

I ain't messin' around
Do it now!

Help me please!

You see, I have this disease...

It should mean more

There is a word that is thrown around a lot .
For ages, the word had a deep meaning.
Sadly, that has changed.

FAMILY.

It used to stand for heritage,honor, love, and strength.
Today, it is just a word for the most part.
It used to matter, family used to mean something.

When tragedies strick, family used to be there.
When blessing arose, family used to be there.
When needed or not, family used to be there.

Now, it is just a way you can label someone on Facebook.
You know, just check on your family every now and again
 on social media , and you are solid.

Family used to stand for closeness. You actually spent time
with people from you own family. Crazy right?

I ,for one,  am fed up with the lack of meaning in family now.

26 Christmases

26 Christmases you were there,
To buy me gifts,
And me how to share.

26 Christmases you gave me happiness
By your tender heart,
And by your selflessness.

26 Christmases you filled my belly
With your O so good food.
I can still smell your glorious eggs and jelly.

26 Christmases you gave me love.
You taught me about Jesus.
And what a real family is made of

26 Christmases you watched me grow.
You raised me right Mom.
Your precious heart is imprinted deep inside,
And will forever shine.

Thank for 26 Christmases Mom ,
My sweet Charlynn

Black Heart

She's gone
She's ever on my mind
You're movin' on
We're still here

You were so mean
I still feel your anger
You're movin' on
We're still here

Gotcha a new one
Good for you
You're movin' on
We're still here

Did what's best for you. huh?
You just added more tears
You're movin' on
We're still here

The hurt isn't gone
It stains
I needed a father
I got inflicted pain

You're movin' on
I'm still here

Soft in the rain

I'm doing alright,
just gettin' by.
I know what you'd say
"baby, do it right"

but I can see that smile,
smiling at me
I can feel those hugs ,
huggin' on me
I can hear that laugh
laughin at me

I'm thinkin on you mama
I wonder, if you're thinkin on me

I'm gonna love my wife,
like you loved me
selfless in it all
soft in the rain

I'm gonna raise these boys
like you raised me
I'll be stern when it's needed
and soft in the rain

I'll  live my life
like you lived yours
Family first
Work, dead last

Good days , bad days
Mostly good
I'm alright mama
Just thinkin on you

Gravity pulls

My life isn't the same

I don't know what to do 

What do I do with the pain?

My soul is hopeless 

I can't see where I am going

What do I do with the darkness? 

My mind is lost 

Focus is impossible
what is the cost?

My path is uncertain
I can't just "move on"
Which road do I go down?

Depression is lurking
The snake is ready
To bite me

When my world seemed to be crumbling
You were there
When I needed to cry
You were there
When I needed to talk
You were there
When I needed a laugh
You were there
When I needed a hug
You were there
Your words still stop me in my tracks.
"Baby, everything is gonna be ok.
Now, let me see that beautiful smile!"

I will never get over you, Momma
I'm sorry that I haven't been smiling much

Sweet Charlynn

Where do I go from here?
I'm so confused.
I lost my mother, my friend.
I lost my sweet Charlynn.

She didn't care of her own  troubles
She only cared of mine.
I lost my mother , my friend
I lost my sweet Charlynn.

She was tender , she was tough
She raised me up.
I lost my mother , my friend.
I lost my sweet Charlynn

You taught me  everything I know.
We laughed, we cried.
I lost my mother ,my friend
I lost my sweet Charlynn

Why did you go?
I'm still so  young, there's still things I don't know.
I lost my mother, my friend.
I lost my sweet Charlynn.

I wanna see you again.
I'd hold onto you, and never let go.
I lost my mother , my friend,
I lost my sweet Charlynn

How beautiful you were !
How pretty your smile!
I lost my mother , my friend.
I lost my sweet Charlynn .

My emotions are outta whack,
My eyes are raw. My heart hurts
I lost my mother, my friend.
I lost my sweet Charlynn.